A Pregnant Woman in the sun

      She had nearly dozed away the whole lazy afternoon, with her eyelash loose down and some naughty hairs playing and rejoicing on her forehead.
      Occasionally, she would knit her brows out of a surge of pain. But when relief came she would smile again and relish once more the enchanting curve of her abdomen, feeling the fresh pulse of the child inside.
     The afternoon went by quietly, of which the highlight might be butterfly that kept pestering her. Now it had alighted on her chair, wings shining in the setting sun, triggering her childlike fantasy. Her finger could not help but snail its way toward the little creature. Nearer and nearer, until the butterfly was finally between her delicate fingers. After a while, she decided to release it. No sooner had she slightly opened her fingers than the little creature sprang right up into the air, as vigorous,  she thought, as her future child would be.
     So, always, true vitality resides in tranquility, as real beauty in love.

簡  評
    本文細致入微地描寫了一位孕婦在午后的陽光下休憩的情景。文章一開始即描寫了孕婦小睡時的悠閑神態(tài)：睫毛低垂著，幾根發(fā)絲在額前拂動。作者隨后描寫了孕婦在時時感受到肉體上痛苦的同時，心中充滿了對腹中嬰兒的母愛。第三段中，作者敘述了一個小插曲：一只蝴蝶擾亂了孕婦的休息，但她不忍殺生，仍將蝴蝶放飛了。作者還有一句對孕婦心理狀態(tài)的描寫：蝴蝶矯健的動作使她聯(lián)想到她未來的孩子也會像那只蝴蝶一樣健壯。
    文章篇幅雖短，但對孕婦的描寫非常到位，有外表、神態(tài)、動作和心理狀態(tài)的描寫，勾勒出了一位充滿愛心的準媽媽的形象，非常鮮明飽滿。
    文章的最后一段點明主題：真正的美在于愛這份高尚的情感中。
    此外，值得一提的是文章的用詞非常優(yōu)美而準確，如some naughty hairs playing and rejolcmg on her forehead；knit her brows out Of a surge Of para；the enchanting curve Of her abdomen等。在描寫抓蝴蝶的動作時Her finger could not help but snail its way toward the little creature．Nearer and nearer，until the butterfly was finally between her delicate fingers．無不充滿了生活的情趣。
    (點評教師：黃鶯)

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